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Tea Time

by Alice Invictus

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1.
Concrete passing below Dashboard lights aglow In my head I can see The girl I imagine frequently So many nights I’ve tried to read Tried to understand the clues you chose to leave And I have yet to shed some light Something please grant me some insight CHORUS: To the leaves of grass Leaning foreheads on glass Another beautiful lonely girl Killing the paper inside of her Unscrew the doors from their jambs I think I might now understand These are the times we feel alive The cracks in us now let in the light And I see you now Our strings are intertwined And I mistook it for a sign I thought she was what I perceived What a treacherous thing to believe That a girl can be more than just a girl Drawing pictures on the wall of her paper world Cutting at the strings that hold her up Trying to decide when she’s gone far enough CHORUS Bridge: All goes onward and outward x3 And nothing, and nothing collapses Nothing collapses CHORUS
2.
I get lightheaded like I’m breathing hydrogen When I realize what a mess I’ve gotten myself in Aboard this ship, above the war Something’s happening that I just can’t ignore For sure Aleksander Hapsburg, I don’t care Whether you travel by machine or travel in the air Because the person deep down below Is more important than the one you show I would know Prechorus A hundred hints, a thousand clues A million sideways glances at you and I guess I just don’t understand boys! CHORUS Because…I’m a girl, you idiot! You just can’t seem to take a hint Prince Aleksander, you’re so dumb Prince Aleksander, you’re so dumb You’re so daft that you can’t see that I’m not a lad I guess after all the worrying, my disguise wasn’t too bad Count Volger, Bovril, and Dr. Barlow But every except you already knows It guess it shows You think I’m your best friend, and you’re not all wrong Can you really not see what’s been right here all along Your fencing partner, your right hand man Be by your side, Alek, that’s the plan Can you understand? Prechorus CHORUS X2
3.
Narration: I'm about to tell you the story of my life. More specifically, why my life ended. And if you're listening to these tapes, you're one of the reasons why. Thirteen tapes in a box with my name Nothing would ever be the same The voice of a girl with empty desk Once more in my ears to confess Static crackles and my insides go numb Telling the story to which I know the outcome And suddenly Hannah's words are in my ears The last of hers I'll ever hear PRECHORUS As I walk along and you say goodbye Telling me the thirteen reasons why CHORUS I could've helped, I could've stayed I need to hear what she has to say So I press play...Mmmmm I press play Narration: And, Clay...I'm sorry too. Thirteen tapes, which one is mine? Will I learn how I lead to her demise? If could have saved you Hannah, you know Could've pulled your from the undertow But because I left when you told me to I'm left with just a ghost of you So many signs I should have seen None of us have our hands clean PRECHORUS CHORUS PRECHORUS AND CHORUS LAYERED Narration: I guess that's the point of it all. No one knows for certain the impact they have on the lives of other people. Often times we have no clue. And yet we push it just the same PRECHORUS AND CHORUS LAYERED Narration: A lot of you cared...just not enough. I'm sorry.
4.
Will my life end like those in books that I have read? Is half a sentence all I get to end the life I’ve lead Never quite a child and not yet quite fully grown After all it’s over what will I have to show? Will I write some letters to an author I adore? Will I play a sport for my Dad that I think is a bore? Will I, in the end, have said all that I have had to say? When it comes down to it, will I keep the promise anyway? CHORUS The world is not a wish granting factory, Hazel Grace What marks will we leave for people yet to take out place? Each and every day we are presented with a choice What do we shout to the void? What echoes in our voice? Will I fall in love with someone in such a short time? Will we go to Amsterdam? What ladders will I climb? Will I learn to not make people something that they’re not? Will I learn just how fast and how much they all forgot Or is that just nature of us, to forget those who’ve passed To focus on the days that we still have while they last Or maybe in the time we have we’re never meant to know Questioning why we are here until the day we go CHORUS ENDING CHORUS But that’s not the point I guess, remembered by us all The marks we leave can still be great and yet seem very small Our infinity might not be as large as other ones I’m grateful for the days we had to do the things we’ve done.

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released August 17, 2011

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Alice Invictus East Lansing, Michigan

Nonbinary lover of fictional worlds, armed with a guitar, a microphone and a whole lot of unironic enthusiasm.

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